My kids are well aware of the pain and the lack of communication that was in my marriage. They suffered from it for years. And I consider myself to be one of the lucky ones when dealing with a spouse with BPD. She has accepted her illness, she has been in treatment for years and she is doing well now, not cured, there is no cure, but she is learning to cope and I am very proud of her.
我的孩子们很清楚我在婚姻中所承受的痛苦和沟通缺乏。他们承受了多年。在与BPD配偶打交道中，我认为自己是幸运者之一。因为她已经接受了她的病，她已经治疗了多年，她现在做得很好，不过没有治愈，因为没有治愈这回事，但她正在学习如何应对，我为她感到骄傲。

Unfortunately you can't erase years of resentment and distrust. or the suffering and damage that that causes to you, your children and your spouse. I share the financial worry, hell even more so, as my wife and I are finally splitting up we are on the verge of bankruptcy from the cost of medication and counseling, the loss of income and the damage to my career for never really being mentally at work or in the marriage, just trying to get by, and from the repeated bad choices that we, and I mean we, have made throughout the marriage.
不幸的是，你无法抹去多年的愤恨和不信任。或对你、你的孩子和你的BPD配偶造成的痛苦和损害。我有同样的经济担忧，地狱甚至更多，因为我的妻子和我终于分手了，我们正处于破产的边缘，从药物和谘询费用，收入损失和我的职业生涯的损害，因为从来没有真正在工作或婚姻上有足够的精神意志，只是试图得到，从重複错误的选择，我的意思是在我们整个婚姻。

As for my children, my wonderful, very intelligent children, they are both in trouble for truancy, not because the skip school and go hang out somewhere, they both skip school to be home, trying to understand what is going on and trying to help mend the brokenness in a home that is not theirs to mend.
至于我的孩子，我的美好、非常聪明的孩子，他们都有旷课的麻烦，不是因为逃离学校去某个地方，而是他们都逃离学校回到家，想试图了解家裡正在发生了什麽，并试图帮助修补在不是他们的修补的家裡的破碎。

I am not going to lie, I am terrified of being on my own, I am terrified of what the future holds but something has to change and whatever it is it is going to be better than my "accidental death" temporarily fixing my financial woes, or worse, my staying in a loveless, no sexless marriage.
我说实话，我害怕自己一个人，我害怕未来的事情，但未来必须改变，无论是什麽，它会比我的“意外死亡”暂时解决我的财政困境来得好，或更糟的是，我待在一个无爱、无性的婚姻。

Ironically now that my wife has admitted to not being in love with me anymore she can finally be honest with me about many things, and in the end we are actually better friends now than we have ever been in the last 24 years. Admittedly it is very early, and who knows what the future brings. One day at a time, but I am going to be all right now, and so are my kids. Biggest thing though, don't isolate yourself, that will kill you, get to know people again and open up to them.
讽刺的是，既然我的妻子已经承认不再爱我，她终于可以诚实地告诉我很多事情，跟过去24年相比，我们变成比以前更好的朋友。诚然，说这话还很早，谁知道未来带来什麽。但我现在都会好好的，我的孩子也一样。最重要的事，不要孤立自己，这将杀了你，再去多认识人，并对他们敞开心胸，吐露心声。

新春愉快

这个好！